Blighted Bellies n Pelvic Dreams

My journey to having a baby as a 38 yo with undetected Pelvic Inflammation Disease

How DID I get here?

on February 10, 2013

12 minutes in 2012, thats how long it took to get the answer.

So, how DID I get here? I am always asking myself this question. The answer, sadly, is quite easily. And I imagine it happens all the time. Life happens!

One minute you’re busily working away, then BANG!!!! I want a kid and I want it NOW, your insides seem to say. But at 26, 32 then 36 years of age, it didn’t happen for me.

I think of all my half-hearted efforts to fall pregnant and now wished time hadn’t passed so quickly. I wish that I hadn’t been so dismissive when I didn’t fall pregnant. If I knew I had forever, that my body clock wouldn’t be wearing out, I could wait. But that ain’t how Mother Nature plays the game.

Now I am 38 and trying IVF. Nope, not trying….I will fall pregnant with IVF!!!!

So who am I?

I am an anonymous 38 year old primary school teacher. I have been married, lived with 2 long term boyfriends and always, desperately, wanted to have babies. I have been pregnant and miscarried at 12wks, in my married life, but never fallen pregnant again.

I want to have babies. Not just my 9am to 3pm kids that I love, nurture, care and educate, only to send home to houses with no love or understanding. Not my best friends-immaculate-conception-dont-know-how-it-happened baby.

There are no nieces or nephews possible even, due to my only sisters childhood brain tumour. So the pressure has always been on me to perform.

And how did I get here?

By a fluke conversation with a work colleague. I asked who her gyno was, as I wasn’t happy with mine, and Wah-Lah! Got a number, rang and booked in.

In 12 minutes he was able tell me that my blighted ovum-partial miscarriage- retained products-spontaneous natural abortion 12 years ago, caused irreparable damage to my poor lil fallopian tubes. And not one doctor since has even hinted at any problems what-so-ever!

Within 2 hours, tests were done, info dished out at lightning speed and consent forms signed. Before we were even home 3 hours later, phone calls with test results were called through!

Twelve years ago there was no internet for me to find out more info. I never knew WHAT a blighted ovum, retained products OR Pelvic Inflammatory Disease were.

Twelve years ago, I could have had my four dream children! I could have saved thousands in doctors’ bills trying to find out why my cycle has been horrendously irregular. Experimenting with different contraceptives that didn’t work for me. Countless ultrasounds with false diagnoses. Hormone enhancing drugs that are useless anyway if your eggs don’t travel on their own accord.

And that’s why I am writing this blog. Surely I’m not the only one…..


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